why would you be disapproving if they secretly read *Fifty Shades of Grey* - the book having been secretly passed around at school? What would be your main objections, if any? . Why not allow a fifteen year old to (hopefully) come to the conclusions herself re the standard of writing, what it depicts and how it portrays men and women. I had to read Tess of the D'Urbervilles by Thomas Hardy as part of the school curriculum and to write about it in nationally marked examinations: the central figures in that novel are a woman who is dominated by ma man - raped and left to fend for herself. So at 16 years old we are already contemplating adult issues in the classics ... I also find it odd how many people here use the word *allow* or *forbid* because in my school the majority of students were occasionally drinking and having sex with long term boyfriends/girlfriends so the misconception that parents have 100% *control over sexually mature teenagers seems a bit odd to e - despite what the law says about who can or can't engage in certain activities or what books they can read. PS I haven't read Fifty Shades but a female friend of mine said she said it was about bold sub/dom yet mild consensual sadomasochism. If the woman in the book is enjoying it in some way how can you say the book *degrades* women? .
Best Answer:
Rawr at 05 May,2013
i wouldn't be disapproving. its a book. she'll see worse things in an average PG-13 movie. 14-15 years old is more than old enough. most kids have seen violent rape porn by that age. if i haven't addressed these issues with her well before age 14-15 and given her the tools to be critical and responsible whenever she does come across them, then i am pretty much a failure as a parent.
Other Answers:
- It gives an erroneous impression that BDSM is about abuse.
Its drivel. - The main objection would be ---
Everything we take into our mind-shapes our future either consciously or subconsciously.
If it is not a healthy behavior then do we really want to put that stuff in our minds?
The other thing I would do is to ask questions:
-=----do the characters in this book have a healthy respect for each other?
-------what is the potential outcome of this type of relationship.
------ What type of values are portrayed in this book?
------Are these the same type of values you want to have in your life? - I have a daughter who will turn that age one day and me and her Father have discussed things like this. We would not allow her to read it. Simply because it's just a horrible book and it glamorises abusive men. I don't want my daughter thinking that it's ever OK and if a man ever treated my daughter badly her Father would make him wish he hadn't.
- Yes, I would be extremely disapproving. I haven't read it but from what I've heard it's not something I'd like to encourage.
My older daughter has read it (20), as have my daughters in law. Maybe I should shock them all and read it publically - that would freak them out.
But well, I'm not into erotic literature. So as far as I know, my 17 year old hasn't read it. She's reading Northanger Abbey at the moment. - i wouldn't be disapproving. its a book. she'll see worse things in an average PG-13 movie. 14-15 years old is more than old enough. most kids have seen violent rape porn by that age. if i haven't addressed these issues with her well before age 14-15 and given her the tools to be critical and responsible whenever she does come across them, then i am pretty much a failure as a parent.